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We always face people on a daily/weekly basis who possess the superpower to shut our mood instantly by their unapologetic comments. You don’t necessarily need to have bad luck to come across to these kinds of people. In fact, they are part of your unfiltered life by default. You can spot them as a relative, colleague, and close friend or even as a sibling.
But we can protect our emotions and mood by keeping in mind following saviour tricks:
1. Have Mental Red-mark:
By this I mean to say, you know who they are. You also know how harsh and ruthless their opinions are. So, simply have a mental note about their behavior. This way when they will throw out some thoughtless comments next time, your mood will feel guarded. Because your mind will instantly reply to you “they have been always like that”. Thus you won’t be hurt.
2. Isolate Their Opinion:
Normally there are two main reasons behind such kind of behavior of these particular persons. One is their opinion is not about you; rather it’s about themselves. If they body shame you or your looks then it’s not because there’s something wrong with you. It’s because they are not comfortable with their body. Another reason is having no empathy. Often times, there are people who lack the common sense of understanding and end up commenting whatever comes to their mind. They have no intention to hurt you and they simply don’t have the understanding of how deeply their thoughtless words can cut.
So when you know the reasons, you won’t take their opinions personally.
3. Be Mindful About What You Share:
There are matters, which are close to our heart and it can be sensitive to get any kind of negative comments on such matters. So, the simple way to protect it is not sharing. You don’t need to share the matters for which you can tolerate any kind of comments. Be mindful about your sharing with such kind persons. Better to share when you are mentally prepared.
4. Filter Their Comments:
Learn to customize what you receive. Don’t let any word pass your peace gate without your conscious guard. For example, you shared about your upcoming project for which you are really excited and have been working for a long time. Now, if they give you any sceptical opinion about your work or project, don’t feel discouraged or bad. Because rather than taking that opinion you need to pause and learn to see the actual fact. You are the one who has more idea and who has been working and will you let it dim by someone’s opinion with 2second thought?
5. Clear The Cloud:
There are so many issues that arise only because of the lack of communication. Often times we are bothered but still, we don’t share the issue with the person who is bothering us. Instead, we expect an understanding from the person. So, the first thing you should keep in mind that they are NOT YOU. A lot will start to make sense after that. So by sharing the issue you are saving your own energy, not just protecting it. Being clear about your standards and expectations will clear the cloud and will set a label on how you value your own thoughts and so should they.
As there’s a saying keep your circle small and your beer cold. Try to cut out as many negative persons as possible. Of course, there are relations or situations from where we can’t cut everyone out; I mean to say your default squad here. But apart from that be always alert and selective when you are letting any new person enter in your life. After all that we allow will continue. Keep your surroundings filled up with positive people and protect your emotional state.